HOW MUCH IS TOO MUCH???

John Paul & Elizabeth Ann just quite can't wake up this lazy Saturday morning!

Fall can be exhausting for Moms and Dads.  There are football games and volleyball tournaments, choir practices and band rehearsals.  Add in a little homework with carpooling on the side, and it’s quite the full life.  Often before bed, Tom and I look at each other and say, “OK, what’s happening tomorrow?” as we carefully plan out who’s driving whom to what corner of Mobile.  Our family calendar on the wall is so complex that it almost requires an advanced degree in mechanical engineering to make it all work!  Truth be told, we love it all.  It is a great joy to see the kids do well in activities they love.  Someone asked me the other day at John Paul's football practice, "Tired of this yet?"  and I honestly answered to her surprise,  "No way, man!  Can't wait for the first game!" 

BUT, moderation in all things.  Our kids would love to enroll in everything, and as their mom, I'd love for them to try.  So at the start of every school year we ask ourselves, “Have we taken on too much? Are our kids involved in too many activities?  Should we cut out something?”  As we discern these questions yet once again, we’d like to share with you some of the guidelines we consider in our household…

Are the children thriving?

First we look at each child and discuss how he or she is doing.   Are they happy?  Are their attitudes positive and cheerful?   Are they juggling their activities successfully and keeping up with school work?  Do they have healthy friendships that build them up?  If the answers are yes, these are all good signs.  Can they play independently, or do they look to you for constant entertainment?  Are they exhausted?  Do they mope around the house?  Are they so busy that they can’t keep up with regular chores and homework?  These could be warning signs.

Do the kids have enough free time?

For the younger set:  when’s the last time your children came home good and dirty, covered from head to toe?  Kids need time to be kids.  They should have some unstructured time to allow their imaginations and independence to flourish.  Hyper-scheduling so they are on the go from one activity to the next turns childhood into a job and risks burning them out on the activities they once loved.  It may also pigeonhole them too early in certain skills.  Free time allows them to discover a wider array of interests and talents they may not have known they had.  Make sure their extracurriculars aren’t preventing them from running around the neighborhood with friends, digging in the dirt, reading their favorite new series, or shooting baskets in the driveway.

Are the children able to spend time with the rest of the family?

Don’t let activities be so all-consuming that you have no family togetherness at home.   Sure, sometimes we tell ourselves that time spent at Bobby’s soccer games IS family time since we are all there together, but let’s be realistic:  Bobby is playing soccer, Mom and Dad are chatting with friends on the sideline, and little Susie and Timmy have run off to the playground because the game doesn’t hold their attention.  That alone is not sufficient family time; family time means Interacting,  doing something together,  like sharing a meal and conversation or playing a game.  We all know how crucial dinnertime is – make sure the activities don’t prevent your family from ever sitting down to eat together.  Of course some days are extra crazy, and there may be special events that prevent a sedate family meal, but the norm should be dinner together, even if it means eating earlier or later to accommodate schedules.  (Dinner at 7:30 or later is pretty common in our household during football season.)

Are you and your spouse able to spend time together?

Don’t forget about your own marriage in the midst of all the madness!  There have been days where Caroline comes screeching up to a choir concert with a ballerina in tow, while Tom zooms in with the other car, loaded with a quarterback and a sleepy four-year-old … we look at each other and say, “Oh hello!  Nice to see you!”  We know too much is happening when we can never attend an event in one car!  Make a conscious effort to carve out special time with your spouse, even if it’s just snuggling on the couch with coffee and your favorite TV show.    If this is impossible, something must change in your schedules.   It is OK to say no.  Our kids do not have to play every sport, audition for every play, join every club, attend every party. 

Remember:  Just because an activity is a great opportunity for your child doesn’t mean you have to sign him or her up -- great opportunities will certainly come along again. 

SO WE'RE HEADED FOR DISNEY ... IS IT EVEN POSSIBLE TO STAY WITHIN OUR BUDGET?? (part 2)

In case you missed the last post, the answer is YES!

We just returned from a happy (though scorching & wet) trip to our favorite vacation spot, after being away for five years.   Thought I'd post some thoughts on traveling to Disney with a big family ... if nothing else, it will help me remember for next time.   Upcoming posts:  What You Absolutely, Positively Must Pack.
Keep tuning in! 
 

For all Disneyphile big families out there, here are our last three ways to enjoy the Disney magic without depleting your bank account:

#3.   Recycle your Disney gear from trip to trip.  We have a large plastic container that holds all of our Disney fun stuff.  After each trip, it all goes back in.  We're talkin' shirts, lanyards, beltbags, backpacks, hats, and especially mouse ears.  I know what you're all thinking.  In the Disney afterglow you're thinking how much fun it would be if you leave it all out to enjoy.  Don't do it.  You know what will surely happen:  mouse ears get squashed, pin backs fall out, lanyards slip behind shelves, and shirts fall into the abyss of the laundry room never to reappear.  If you pack it all up right away, you will save money in the long run.  A few weeks before our trip, we pull out the Disney box. We're all excited to see our collection, and it adds to the trip anticipation.  The Disney box is the only way we still have discontinued Jack Sparrow (that's Captain Jack Sparrow) pirate mouse ears from 2007 (left).  And of course, we hit the parks armed with great stuff to begin with, so splurging is less of a temptation.

#2.  BYOPonchos.  This is not an original idea, but it's a crucial one that I must mention, because so many families forget!  How do I know?  Check out the sea of Mickey raingear that emerged during this downpour, and then remember that Disney charges $9 a pop for 'em.

If you are headed to Orlando in the spring or summer, it WILL rain.  You must be prepared to slosh through afternoon thundershowers.  Go to the Dollar Store and load up on cheap ponchos - they'll fit easily into your backpacks and you can toss them after the trip.  Don't bother with your own raincoats or umbrellas from your closet; they're too bulky for your backpacks and you'll regret it.  If you have big boys in your family -- Dads, teenage sons, Grandpas -- buy everyone at least 2.  (After an afternoon of Florida rain and heat, let's just say ... they don't smell "magical" anymore.)  If you get desperate at the end of a long, extra-rainy trip like we just did, you can try this:  I doused all of them in soapy bathwater after EA got out of the tub, then let them drip-dry overnight in the shower.  It did the trick, and I didn't have to throw away $63 for 7 Mickey ponchos.  (We'd rather use that $$ on Dole pineapple floats!!)

#1.  Before buying anything, ask yourself, "Will I actually use this/wear this when I return home to the real world?"  Let's face it:  the same Grumpy shirt that is perfectly acceptable in the Magic Kingdom would be ridiculous at home at say, a football game in the stands.  Will you walk around town with that bright pink Minnie backpack??  Just say no. (The traditional monogrammed mouse ears are the exception of course.)

This time around, we all thought the new illuminated Mickey ears were amazingly cool.  "Glow with the Show" ears change color in sync with the nighttime Disney shows and fireworks, and we McDonalds do LOVE the shows!  But $25 each?  For ears to wear only at night?  When we already had ears for all the kids?  We said no, don't regret it, and saved nearly $200.   
 



 Want more "So You're Headed for Disney ..." posts?  See Why Bother with Matching Shirts? and Is It Even Possible to Stay within our Budget, part 1.

SO WE'RE HEADED FOR DISNEY ... IS IT EVEN POSSIBLE TO STAY WITHIN OUR BUDGET?? (part 1)

Yes!

We just returned from a happy (though scorching & wet) trip to our favorite vacation spot, after being away for five years.   Thought I'd post some thoughts on traveling to Disney with a big family ... if nothing else, it will help me remember for next time.   Upcoming:  What You Absolutely, Positively Must Pack.

Keep tuning in!

Let's face it:  going to Disney is really, really, expensive.  Some folks say it's as pricey as flying your family to Europe.  (I suppose if you're staying in a deluxe Disney resort, it certainly could be.  But we are All-Star resort folks, sooo ... not exactly European pricing.)  Once you save up for your Disney package and click Purchase, how can you remain calm, resist the Disney magic urge to spend, spend, spend, and not leave Orlando bankrupt?  If you've ever entered the World, you'll know what I mean.  Something mysterious happens, and you develop overwhelmingly intense desires to buy Mickey Mouse flip-flops, pajamas, and underwear. Cool dudes with tattoos walk around with light-up mouse ears.  Grandpa wears a Grumpy T-shirt.  Grandma dons a hot pink princess hat.  The $40 Frozen dolls that your 4-year-old falls in love with suddenly seem perfectly reasonable.  And shouldn't every family have a 5 foot tall stuffed Mickey Mouse?

And now spending money is even easier with the introduction of Magic Bands, which serve as your room key, park ticket, fast pass, and yes, even your credit card.  Just wave your arm in any store and whatever you want is yours.  (I actually love the ease of the Magic Bands, but with no actual money ever switching hands, it could be very dangerous.  Just sayin.')  So for any Disneyphile families out there, here are our top 5 ways to enjoy the Disney magic without depleting your bank account:

#5.  BYOH2O.  Before your trip, throw a case of water bottles in your trunk or have some delivered to your room  (see Garden Grocer).  I promise that after one hour in the Florida sun you will tempted to pay any amount for something icy to drink.  Ten bucks for a souvenir cup of LeFou's Brew?  Give me 5!  I guarantee you'll be that desperate.  So if you have cold water in your back pack all ready to go, you will save buckets of money.  For those on the dining plan (we always are), don't waste your snack credits on drinks;  get your coke fix with your meals instead since they're included.  Most Disney rooms have small fridges now; as soon as you arrive turn your fridge down to its coldest setting, and throw in your water.  If driving, better yet, you can freeze them ahead of time for a head start.  The other thing you must bring is a bottle or two of Mio drops.  (Walmart has an off-brand that's cheaper.) By hour two your water bottles will be empty .  I can't explain why, but most water fountains in the park aren't very cold, and the Florida water has a weird taste.  Surely Disney would not allow that intentionally to make us want to buy more drinks, right???  The Mio helps - a little.  (Christopher reports that the water fountains near Space Mountain are cooler and tastier than most.)  And, while you're waiting for your table service reservation outside, many restaurants have cold water dispensers sitting out, and that's a great time and place to refill your family's bottles with decent water.  We saw this at Crystal Palace in the Magic Kingdom, and at Hollywood & Vine at Disney Studios.  OK - for thirsty folks, here's my best secret - it only took us five trips to discover this... at the Backlot Express in Disney Studios, they have a fill-your-own-drink station!!!!! That means free refills at a Disney Park!!!!  The food there was just OK, but they did have adorable Frozen cupcakes (see left). So buy your drinks and maybe a few cupcakes to share, and bask in air-conditioned, Diet Coke Heaven.

P.S.  We actually loved LeFou's Brew (see below).  Think Apple Icee topped with mango foam!  Buy 1 or 2 in the NON-souvenir cups for half the price, and let everyone take a swig just for fun.  Keep a lookout for Gaston while you swig; he often appears near Gaston's Tavern, and he is quite hilarious.

#4.  Buy your souvenirs before your trip.  And then hide them.  Every ride exits into a super-fun store, where there is wall-to-wall temptation to wave that Magic Band and blow your budget.  And it IS fun to bring home new souvenirs and toys from your vacation.  So if you buy a few things ahead of time, you can resist!  A few months before your trip, pay attention to your little one's favorite characters (Elizabeth Ann is nuts for Sophia the First) and start perusing the sales.  Walmart has toy clearance aisle that routinely has Disney stuff.  Much cheaper to buy a Princess Barbie at Target than in the Parks. The Dollar Store also has plenty of Disney crayons and coloring books.  Before you leave your hotel room each morning, you can pull out something fun while little ones aren't looking, and then when you return, it's as if Mickey delivered them!  More Disney Magic.

What's the ONE souvenir to splurge on in the Parks?  Mouse ears, of course!

On the Disney bus, sporting her new mouse ears.  Princess ones, of course!

You can get a monogrammed set of ears for $20 or less, which is bearable.  Since these are items that are only available in the Disney Parks, we think it's worth it.  The kids save theirs and re-wear them in years to come.  Peter and Christopher have Jack Sparrow pirate mouse ears from when they were younger that are no longer made.  The folks in Disneyland Paris went nuts over them.

Kids goofing around in 2009 with the now-coveted pirate ears.

That's enough for now.  Tune in next time to discover our final three ways to ward off budget-busting.

Want more "So You're Headed for Disney ..." posts?  See "Why Bother with Matching Shirts?"

SO WE'RE HEADED FOR DISNEY ... DO I REALLY NEED TO BOTHER WITH MATCHING SHIRTS? (part 2)

In case you missed the last post, the answer is YES!

We just returned from a happy (though scorching & wet) trip to our favorite vacation spot, after being away for five years.   Thought I'd post some thoughts on traveling to Disney with a big family ... if nothing else, it will help me remember for next time.   Upcoming posts:  How to Stay on Budget when you visit the World & What You Absolutely, Positively Must Pack.
Keep tuning in!

There is only one place where my husband will willingly run or wear matching clothes, and that is Disney World.  We've traveled with and without coordinating shirts, and even he agrees that they're extremely helpful (but I say it's just fun and they're so dang cute!)

In our last post you can read about Mickey and Minnie tie dye shirts that you see above ... this time I want to show you my new favorite thing:  Heat-n-Bond Ultra Hold.

I don't really sew and I don't own a sewing machine, but I aspire to be one of those crafty moms who can make adorable things.  So if I'm speaking your language, you've got to run out and buy some sheets of Heat Bond.  If you can iron, you can make an amazingly cute shirt, backpack, whatever.

Here was my first attempt.  I was just experimenting ... and after a day in Epcot and 3 washings, it has held up! Some DIY websites recommend stitching around the edges after ironing on the material, but since I don't sew, I didn't.  (The directions on the Ultra Hold package say don't sew, so I obeyed!)  This took me all of 5 minutes, from start to finish.  My kind of craft project.

This worked so well that it inspired me to keep going.  I had a plain white dress for Elizabeth Ann that I had been saving to monogram, but never did.  So I added yellow pom pom balls on the bottom, and another Mickey with her initial:

 I made coordinating shirts for Emma and me, and of course stitched on a little bow to make it more Minnie.  (I CAN at least use a needle and thread.)  Here is the design up close.  We were stopped by so many people asking about them:

And here is one last view of the dress:

OK, so how can you get started?  After you've got your Heat Bond (found it super cheap at Walmart), find some fabric you can get excited about.  I didn't like Walmart's selections, so I went to Joanne's and found a cute set of coordinating fabrics. I love, love, love these patterns.  It was only $10 for the whole set, and it was way more than enough for all our projects.  I still have a ton left:

Find some Mickey templates and cut them out.  There are a million out there on line.  I printed out several sizes because I have kids of all ages and sizes.  I just held them up to the shirts to see which one fit the best.

If you also want to add an initial, just print out a letter in your favorite font in your word processing program.  Again, experiment with a few different fonts and sizes.  I finally settled on "Curlz," the one on the right.  Cut out the letter to make a template, just like you did for the Mickey head.

And now you're ready to iron.  Read the directions carefully on the Heat Bond package; I did, and it was very clear what to do.  I'll just add a few reminders.  First, turn on your iron to get nice and hot, but turn off the steam.  Remember that each shape you add takes two steps.  First you iron on the backing, that turns your shape into a kind of iron-on patch, then you iron your "patch" on to the shirt.

So get the material ready.  If it's wrinkled, iron it a little.  Then flip the material over to the wrong side.  Iron on the Heat Bond.  Just takes about 8 seconds.  Let it sit for a few minutes to cool off.

Now you're ready to use your templates to make your Mickey head and letters.  Trace them on the Heat Bond.  If you're using a letter, be sure to turn it around backwards.  As you can tell, I'm a very messy tracer.  But that's OK; it's the cutting that's important.

Use your sharpest scissors to cut them out.  You want nice smooth edges.  Here are my 2 finished patches, ready to be ironed on.  (The tiny Mickey head is for Elizabeth Ann's Bitty Baby. I know, I know.  The kids say I'm this close to being one of those crazy Disney moms!)

You're almost done!  Peel off the backing (the white Heat Bond paper), carefully position on your shirt, and iron one last time.  So simple!

So I had so much fun with the shirts, I had to keep going.  Here is a backpack we made for Emma.  Came from the Dollar Store.  (Be careful when ironing, bc the backpack material tends to melt if too hot.)

With Dug and Russell from Up in the Animal Kingdom.  These guys were awesome (and the movie is awesome too.)

Here's the backpack close up:

One last picture.  Here is Elizabeth Ann's outfit for the Animal Kingdom.  Skort came from Walmart (again!) for only $5.  (Worked great for Chick Fil A's Cow Day, too.)  I can't take credit for the design of the shirt - saw it somewhere on line and I can't find it again - but whoever's idea it was, thank you!  So cute!

Now these are admittedly girly heat bond designs; if I were doing this for my boys I would do plain Mickey heads ... something like this:

This Mom used felt and spray adhesive.  Don't know how it holds up after a rainy, sweaty day in the parks, but it's sure cute.

Happy Ironing!

SO WE'RE HEADED FOR DISNEY ... DO I REALLY NEED TO BOTHER WITH MATCHING SHIRTS? (part 1)

YES!

With a hilarious Gaston from Beauty and the Beast in the gorgeous new Fantasyland area.  He told the kids, "OK everybody, think handsome thoughts and say 'Popularity.'"

We just returned from a happy (though scorching & wet) trip to our favorite vacation spot, after being away for five years.  Last time we went I was pregnant with Elizabeth Ann and John Paul was only 3, so you can bet he and I hopped on every wild ride we could.  (The new Seven Dwarves Mine Train was super-adorable with just the right thrill factor.)  Thought I'd post some thoughts on traveling to Disney with a big family ... if nothing else, it will help me remember for next time.

So YES, all those Disney bloggers & Etsy moms are on to something with the whole matching shirt thing.  At first google they may seem fanatical ... a different themed shirt for each of the four parks?  Matching clothes for Grandma and Grandpa even?  Coordinating bows and backpacks?  And come on, Mickey manicures???  But I'm a believer.  At least about the shirts.

For one thing, it helps your group stay together.  As you navigate the parks, crowds split to let you through.  As you enter rides and queuing areas where they admit a limited number at a time (Lion King, Enchanted Tales with Belle, Turtle Talk with Crush) your whole family easily gets let in at once.

Your family pictures also turn out great; my favorite pics are always the ones in matching shirts.

But the best reason of all?  Little ones are less likely to get lost.  If you've never been to Disney in the summertime, it is hard to fathom the number of people.  Think wall-to-wall bodies.  Then add half the teen population from Brazil and Argentina, who roam around in huge tour groups during the summer. The day we DIDN'T wear matching shirts, nine-year-old John Paul started following another teenage boy with a red shirt who looked exactly like his big brother.  Thankfully, I had stopped behind our group to adjust the stroller, so I saw him veer off and was able to nab him.  Honestly, my one regret about the shirts is that we only had enough for 2 days. It was so much harder to keep everyone together.  Next time I'll have enough for every day in the parks.

You don't have to break the bank to pull this off.  Just spend a little time cruising all the "crazy Disney mom sites," as my kids have labeled them, and you'll be overwhelmed with do-able, fun ideas.  I stumbled upon the tie dye Mickey shirts, and Emma and I knew we had to try them.  Turned into a great mom & daughter project.  There are a kajillion DIY sites, but we found this one to be the most helpful.  We added the bow on the three girls' shirts for more of a Minnie look.  Below are two of ours ... after 3 washings, they still look pretty good.

We bought our tie dye colors in individual bottles from good ol' Walmart.  (We used blue, green, and turquoise.)  Don't forget the soda ash soak - you can buy soda ash in the same section in Walmart.  You can use old T shirts that you already own - the dye will cover imperfections - or you can buy a few inexpensive ones.  We had good luck at Joanne's finding some for the girls for only $3.99; the boys used ones from their drawers.  100% cotton works best for the dye and for the heat in the park! We were stopped at least 5 times by folks admiring our shirts, asking where we bought them.

Now if your hubby is not thrilled about matching shirts, and your fervent pleas for the safety of your children don't move him, you could always try something like this:

 

We actually saw a guy in the Magic Kingdom with a version of this shirt, which coordinated with his family's shirts, and he looked great. (Whether he liked to admit it or not!)  

Tune in next time to see my all-time favorite DIY shirts and to meet my new best friend, Ultra Heat Bond.