"LORD, TEACH US TO PRAY"

Peter's First Communion; at the crypt chapel above Peter's bones, under the main altar of St. Peter's Basilica;  Summer 2008.

The kids will tell you that I avoid going upstairs at all costs.  The kids' bedrooms and bathroom are up there, and let's just say that it's bad for my mental health.  But, when out-of-town company is planning to visit, I steel myself and venture up to make sure their version of "clean" is my version of "company-ready."  Last week when I was shoveling the junk helping them pick up, I ran across some prayer cards that I made years ago for my two older boys.  I was trying to help them get in the habit of praying in the mornings, of offering their day to the Lord.  Since they both love sports, I came up with a sports acronym to make it easy to remember:  Make a G.O.A.L. for Jesus everyday ...

• Good Morning, God.
• Offer your day to the Lord:  "Dear Jesus, I give you today all that I am and do and say."
• Ask for help.  What are your special intentions?
• Listen for His voice.

A little corny, I know, but they were young and I do think it helped them.  We laminated them (of course - I love, love lamination) and they kept them by their beds for several years.  They both freely admit that they don't use the G.O.A.L. method any more, but I know they once did, and I'd like to think that it inspired a little more prayer in their lives.  And I especially hope it opened them up to the idea of LISTENING for direction/inspiration from the Lord.
  

This weekend I'll be making 2 more cards for Emma and John Paul, also sports fans. (Like my other teacher-y things on this blog, I like to print them out on cardstock, mount on scrapbook paper, and then, well -  you know what to do next!  Remember, the shiny contact paper also looks great.)  Feel free to download your own morning prayer cards - there is a basketball and a soccer version.  Each sheet makes three cards.  Emma is requesting a volleyball version, so I may add that soon.

So rediscovering those cards has gotten me to thinking ... how can we encourage a love for Christ in our children?  I pray hard for that daily ... that all my children will come to know, love and serve the Lord.  But what more can we parents DO?  I'd love to hear from all you great families out there.  Let's get this discussion going!  "Lord, teach us (and our children) to pray."

IN PRAISE OF VIDEO GAMES

I like having a video game system in our  home.

There.  I said it.  (And Tom wants you to know that this is really NOT him, writing under my name!)   Like you, I've read all the stuff about the dangers of gaming:  fat, depressed kids with no social skills.  Or worse, creepy future Unibombers like Sid.  See what happened to him below.

And believe me, I resisted the craze for a long time on two fronts - kids and husband.  I finally relented one Christmas about five years ago and agreed to a Wii, long after they were the latest, greatest thing.  I gave in because I really liked the whole movement angle and could see that the kids wouldn't necessarily turn into video zombies.

And I discovered they're pretty dang cool.  Not that I play them myself.  I got on that Wii Fit board and saw my Wii Fit age and BMI, and that was that.

But I loved the fact that the kids made a Mii of me, and that I showed up in games and races without actually having to do anything.  "Hey Mom, you're ref-ing our game, " they called out.  I could be a part of it all while making dinner.  Or even better, while reading my Kindle.  So that warmed me up to this whole phenomena, and now of course we own a PS3 with all the trimmings.  (Y'all, having NetFlix streaming on that thing is amazing ... all the Downton Abbey you want, all the time.)

Some interesting things have happened along the way that I wasn't expecting.  First, it breaks down age barriers.  When you've got a high schooler all the way down to a first grader and  a two-year-old, family games can be a challenge.  Our older kids love playing word games like Scrabble and Bananagrams, but that leaves the little ones out.  And I agree with my older kids:  you can only play Candy Land or Chutes & Ladders so many times before you want to beat your head against  a wall.  But suddenly, with Mario Kart, everyone can play and really compete.  John Paul could actually beat Peter, for real, an "any given Sunday" kind of thing.  (The two-year-old just holds a controller and is usually happy.)  I've seen Christopher (14) and John Paul (7) bond in a whole new way over Skylanders.  And I can't speak for every father around, but the dad in this house enjoys the Play Station as much as any child living here.  He's not exactly into playing Barbies or American Girls, but he gladly sits down to play Little Big Planet with Emma.

Our neighborhood is educationally diverse -- by that I mean we have kids from public schools, our Catholic parish school, an elite private school, and then there are the crazy homeschoolers - that's us.  But none of that means anything in our family room in front of the Play Station ... fire up Lego Pirates of the Caribbean, and they're good to go.  We also have some major athletes on our cul-de-sac, so there are plenty of intense basketball games outside.  The non-sports folks tend to hang back, and I can't blame them for wanting to steer clear.  But turn on Madden 12 and everyone can play football, athletic or no.

We often have boys over from Peter's various sports teams ... in between games or practices while they wait to be picked up.  Twelve-year-old boys are not the most communicative beings on the planet, and the drive home can be awkwardly silent, especially after a heart-breaking loss.   Once again, PS3 to the rescue.  Turn on NCAA Football, and within minutes everyone is laughing, teasing, trash-talking, and all is right with the world.

Please hear me:  I am not saying that the kids shouldn't be outside, or playing board games, or reading.  My kids are avid devotees of all three.  (There is a big Risk tournament going on in our dining room as we speak.)  I am saying that I'm glad we have the option of something else sometimes, and under the right supervision and rules, it can be a good thing in the family.  I'm tired of hearing how evil all video games are.  Moderation in all things - just like the TV.

Here's how we keep things under control:  first, we have the PS3 hooked up to our TV downstairs, right in the middle of everything.  (Same place we have our computer, for the same reasons.)  Yes, it does mean we have to endure some noise, BUT it's worth it.  We are able to monitor content and the time spent playing.  If it were upstairs, the kids could be playing for 5 hours straight and we would never know.  Second, we allow video games only on the weekends, or for a rare special occasion like a birthday.  The PS3 can be turned on after school and chores are done on Friday, on Saturday in moderation, and on Sunday after Mass.  (So of course the kids lobby for the earliest Mass possible!)  The only change we make during the summer is that we allow them to play on Tuesdays as well.  Our neighborhood pool is closed on Tuesdays, and it's hot as hell-fire in these parts, so we make the exception.

The Sids of this world emerge from endless hours of playing dark, blow-up-the-known-world gore-fests alone, maybe chatting on-line with who-knows-who.  So we don't allow the earphones, and we buy games that encourage group play ... sports games especially, that allow up to 4 players.  If it's a 2-player game, we aim for broad appeal like all the Lego titles, which are completely cute, by the way.  It goes without saying that we don't allow the trashy ones with the bad ratings.  I don't care how cool it is, I'm not having scantily-clad women or curse words in our family room.  (We had to get rid of a seemingly innocuous Spider Man game because Spidey kept yelling, "This sucks!"   I don't need my incredibly verbal two-year-old learning that lovely phrase yet.)

Put those rules in place and the gaming system just may help family unity.  Better than retreating to all 4 corners of the house hooked up to their iPods all day.

And it's a powerful discipline tool ... you can take away game privileges when behavior is not up to snuff.  Or you can be the coolest mom ever by allowing gaming on a weekday just because.  But not too often.

Sid grows up to be a garbage man in Toy Story 3.  Not that there's anything wrong with that.

ORDER FROM CHAOS

How NOT to start off a good school day:  walk into our homeschool classroom to see this:

    Or this:

And yes, that IS a severed hand amidst the Latin books, a holdover from our All Saint's party, where one of the boys dressed as St. Isaac Jogues.

I am instantly cranky when this happens and am NOT inspired to teach the good, the true, and definitely NOT the beautiful.  I mean, please look, just look at the carpet:

I've attempted many things over the years to inspire cleanliness, but each year it's gotten a little harder.  We've tried straightening up right before we begin our school prayers in the morning, but all that does is delay our start ... one cleaning project leads to another and another, and we're exhausted before we begin actual lessons.  And not only that, I still start the day by walking into the mess!  So then I tried adding "Tidy up School Room" to our afternoon chore list, and each day a different kid tackled it.  But our afternoons are so crazy ... usually we're barely squeezing our last subject in (or just skipping it altogether - that's why my kids' science test scores stink!) before the mad dash in the minivan to choir, football, soccer, yada yada yada.  Wasn't working.

To add to the mayhem, this year we reached our maximum capacity in the homeschool classroom:  4 students, one teacher, one 2-year old, and a mountain of books.  (And yes, kids, cuz I know you're reading this, much of the mess does come from her.)  But the fact remains that Mom is happier with order around her, and everyone knows that Happy Mom=Happy Students and a Good School Day.  Sooo, instead of nagging and griping, I was inspired to conduct Desk Inspections ... which includes their cubby holes, shelves and the floor around their desks.  If I find their area suitable, they will discover a Super Clean Desk Award on their desktops, along with some kind of prize.  (It doesn't work without the prize, folks, so don't be cheap!)  Might be a pack of gum, or some toy I found on clearance, or most coveted of all, a box of movie theater candy.  (You know, those boxes of Skittles or Sour Patch Kids or Snowcaps that you can get for under a $1 at WalMart)

If their area is a trash heap -- see above -- they get nothing.  Now I'm not saying miracles happened or anything, but I can tell you that all I have to do is mention that there might be a desk inspection sometime soon, and a flurry of frantic cleaning ensues.  I might do one a week, or 3 a week, or wait for a month to go by.  Sometimes they're random, sometimes they're announced, sometimes I just happen to let slip that I got some new candy on clearance ...

I've included a template that so you can make your own.  It works in my homeschool classroom, and I see no reason why it wouldn't work in a regular classroom for cubbyholes or lockers.  I have a set of four that I re-use, just in case I have four winners at once - a very rare occasion because I am picky.  Print out on card stock, laminate, and have fun inspecting.  Results guaranteed.


Your Catholic Teacher's Friend,

Prometheus

Got a chance to see the Alien "prequel" Prometheus last night with my Archangel Radio compadres, Todd Sylvester and David Renshaw.  I have long been an admirer of director Ridley Scott and (some of) the Alien films.  I had high hopes for this film, especially since it was co-written by Damon Lindelof, the mastermind behind the television series Lost, my favorite series of all time.
I was not disappointed.  The film was well-written, well-paced, suspenseful, smart, and puzzling in all the right ways.  This movie is not for folks who like everything spelled out in black and white.
The film is rated R primarily for some icky sci-fi violence, and would be appropriate for older teens.

Caroline's take:
(Hey - I am the Czarina, right?)  By "older teens" Tom means that he didn't bring Christopher (14) and Peter (12) along.  And y'all know I love to see anything and am not squeamish, but I am NOT seeing this one ... unless Tom bribes me with dinner out beforehand, popcorn during, and Starbucks after.  Heck, I'd even see a dang Sponge Bob movie under those conditions!  But that original Alien film scared the tuna salad out of me as a kid -- right up there with Omen -- and I can't bring myself to go there again!  Don't you remember that spooky trailer:  In Space No One Can Hear You Scream?  The Great Movie Ride at Disney Studios didn't help things ... a nice little boat ride through the Wizard of Oz and then all of a sudden you're in the guts of the spaceship with that alien screeching and spitting goo at you ... no thanks.  I'm saving my money for Brave, coming later in the summer.  Pixar has never let me down.

The First One

OK, so since this is my first post to the McDonald family blog, I'd like to make a few things clear.  If you have been a reader of our Catholic Week column, be warned that like any blog, these posts will be a whole lot less "formal" than our column was.  Since this is a family blog, the topics will range considerably far and wide; likewise, posts will vary wildly in length.

You may have noticed the "Media Czar" designation when you clicked here. If you are a regular listener of Archangel Radio's Live Hour on Friday mornings, you know already that Todd Sylvester slapped that label on me a few months ago, and it has stuck like a piece of sidewalk gum on the bottom of a shoe.  It originates from the fact that my appearances on the radio typically revolve around bringing a Catholic perspective to the latest movies, TV shows, etc.  So, expect posts of that nature here often.

So why not begin now?  This morning, we discussed "For Greater Glory" at length on the show.  Bottom line: while the film has numerous technical/filmmaking flaws, the story is so critically important in our current culture that you really ought to go see it.  While rated R, in my judgement it is appropriate for adolescents and up.  (A good indicator if it's ok for your kids:  if you're fine with them seeing Mel Gibson's The Passion of the Christ, then your kids could definitely handle this.)  Religious freedom is being threatened in our nation today, and this sobering look back to the not-so-distant past in our own backyard (Mexico) serves as a wake-up call for Catholic and believers of any stripe.

I think Steven Greydanus's review is spot on.  (In fact, I agree with him 99% of the time, so add Decent Films to your list of must-reads.)

¡Viva Cristo Rey!

The Last One ...

Welcome, faithful Catholic Week readers and new friends!

In case you missed it, this is a reprint of our last column for the Catholic Week:

Caroline: Our first archdiocesan event was a disaster. It was our first Natural Family Planning series, and Father Wall had graciously invited us to St. Ignatius to get things going. Excited but nervous, we had used NFP for years but had never actually taught it. We had completed a rigorous instructor certification process only two weeks prior. So we practiced and practiced and prayed even more. Back then, the classes relied on Kodak slide projectors. We dusted one off from the attic of Catholic Social Services and were all set. Ten minutes into the 2-hour class, however, the projector bulb blew. My dear husband, always convinced that something terrible will happen, had anticipated this very thing and had another bulb at the ready. It was dead too. We tried frantically to find pictures in the bulky student manual of what we were describing. The poor couples! We consoled ourselves by saying that class #2 would be better. Dear Sr. Frances, our first boss, insisted we buy a new projector with extra bulbs; our next meeting we were brimming with confidence. Twenty minutes after THAT class began, there was an explosion outside and we lost all power. A truck had crashed into a transformer nearby. By the grace of God we taught the couples at least something, and miracle of miracles, two of our most faithful supporters and volunteers, Tommy and Bridget Hannahan, emerged from that class. We’re blessed to now call them friends.

If we could leave you with one final thought, it would be this: God’s plans for us are so much greater than our own. We never dreamed we’d be in this line of work. We were perfectly happy teaching in Dallas. (I certainly never imagined that my Cornhusker Tom, born and raised in the Big 12, would willingly move to SEC territory!) But the Holy Spirit worked on us subtly. First, through dealing with students from different backgrounds, we saw the crucial role of the family. We volunteered in our parish as sponsor couples, meeting with the engaged, trying to promote strong marriages and happy families. We became convinced that the Church’s teaching on sexuality was a hidden gem. Sadly, many of our peers knew nothing about the Theology of the Body. We were teachers by profession; NFP helped us postpone pregnancy for 5 years while Tom finished his PhD coursework; by golly, we should get certified to teach this stuff! A little later, when visiting my parents in Mobile, Father Paul Zoghby (then Director of Catholic Charities) mentioned off-handedly that what he really needed was a couple to promote Catholic family life and teach NFP. Our hearts leapt – we knew the Lord had been preparing us to do that very thing. A few months later, there we were in the NFP class at Ignatius. Take it from us: we never need to be afraid of what God calls us to do. His will, not our own schemes and plans, brings true fulfillment.

Tom: Over the years we’ve tried to raise our children in the faith as best as we can and to share what we have learned with you. We’re still learning! When Larry Wahl invited us to write this column, our only child, Christopher, was just seven months old. Now, as we say farewell, Christopher is about to begin his freshman year at McGill-Toolen. We’ve added four more children on earth - and one in Heaven - and we are about to celebrate our 20th wedding anniversary. We are so grateful for the opportunity we’ve had, and we look forward to continuing to serve the Church locally for many years to come. I will be teaching theology full-time at McGill, while both of us will coordinate Adult Education and Family Ministry at St. Ignatius. Caroline will be getting back to her roots in the classroom, teaching 7th grade religion. We leave the Family Life Office in good hands: I have worked with Dan Johnson for the past five years at McGill, and I can think of no one better to coordinate Family Life ministries.

But we aren’t quite done yet! Please consider joining us for our final Family Life Office event, the annual married couples’ retreat at the Visitation Monastery, August 3 and 4. E-mail tommcdonald1@bellsouth.net for more information.

Both of us: We’ve been blessed with amazing volunteers, too many to list, but THANK YOU. We’re forever grateful to Father Zoghby and Sr. Frances for bringing us here. We’re deeply indebted to our fellow CCL teachers, Vicki and Brian Petters and Mark and Anne Christensen, who have taught NFP “up north” tirelessly and heroically – you’ve been our role models. Thanks to Beth and Woodie Perkins, who caught the vision for our Mother & Daughter/Father & Son programs and have faithfully served from the beginning. To our Creighton teachers, Leslie Buckley, Felricia Brown, and Kristin Blanchard: keep fighting the good fight! To the MSRP volunteer couples, you’re changing lives! And finally to our Family Life Office staff – our children – who have become quite proficient at Xeroxing, folding, stapling … we love you; thanks for helping us make it all work.

You can continue to follow the McDonald Mayhem through our column in the National Catholic Register or through our new blog at www.mcdpartyof5.blogspot.com.